Mutual Love and Affection
Islam calls for mutual love and affection in all of our relationships. So we are forbidden to hate or abandon one another under any circumstances.
It is narrated that the Prophet (pbuh) said, “No two people who love one another for the sake of Islam will let the first minor offence of either of them come between them.” (Bukhari). Any prolonged estrangement in our relationship is unacceptable in this Deen. It is in the best interest of both parties to reconcile the matter as soon as possible. In fact, the longer a deliberate squabble lasts beyond three days, the greater the sin incurred by the parties involved. The better of the two in dispute is the one who takes the initiative to give greetings first. Anyone who has ever really been angry knows just how difficult and humbling this can be. Anger can strike anyone of us and can encourage intense feelings.
Abu Ayyub al-Ansari narrated that the Prophet (pbuh) said, “It is not lawful for a Muslim to desert (not to speak to) his fellow Muslim for more than three days while meeting, one turns his face to one side and the other turns his face to the other side. Indeed, the better of the two is the one who starts greeting the other.” (Bukhari).
Islam appreciates our human nature and how easily we can experience different emotions. For this reason, a time limit of three days has been imposed upon the two arguing parties. Understandably, there may be a need for each person to have space to allow angry feelings to pass. The Muslim man or woman whose faith is deeply affected by Islam will not continue to ignore the other. If we understand that this is a commandment from Allah, and wish to gain His pleasure and reward over our own ego, we can swallow our pride knowing that this type of loyalty is better for our faith.
Tolerance and Forgiveness
In today’s world, it is so easy to become embroiled in an angry exchange over just about anything. Pride coupled with angry feelings can make us less than willing to make peace. When we become angry with one another, and are faced with the opportunity to end an emotionally intense situation, a true believer understands that making the decision to forgive is neither humiliating nor shameful. Rather, the value of forgiveness under such trying circumstances can enrich one’s character and raise their status in the sight of Allah.